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1 Timothy 3:12
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12 Let [esto] the deacons [diakonos] be [esto] the husbands [aner] of one [mia] wife, [gune] ruling [proistemi] their children [teknon] and [kai] their own [idios] houses [oikos] well. [kalos] KJV-Interlinear
12 Let deacons be husbands of only one wife, and good managers of their children and their own households. NASB
Repeating from verse two, the deacon, whether male or female, if they are married, must have only one spouse.
Marriage is never a mandatory state for anyone, however when married, then only one spouse is all that is allowed. This may not apply to most of you, but there are certainly many religions or cults, that embrace the plurality of wives (typically) because that most probably is the only way that they can get followers.
Islam promises virgins. Mormonism promotes polygamy. And this is just to name a couple of contemporary beliefs.
And even though Paul has switched back to the requirements of the male, this is a general statement which applies to both genders. This we get from the context of this chapter.
This requirement emphasizes moral conduct, not necessarily marital status.
It even applies to single men and women with respect to their relationships, thus preventing as morally inappropriate, the flirting or relationship hopping, or other similar activities that are deemed inappropriate between two people. Dating for sensuous variety only, is inappropriate, for example.
Likwise, if the Christian has children and a household, then they are expected to run their family environment with some semblance of responsibility and order.
No responsible parent can run off to their own entertainment, and forget the children. If you have responsibilities, then you are to place them first, and certainly before your own preferences. The needs of the children and family and household always come before your needs or wants.
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