Ephesians 6:4
4 And, [kai] ye fathers, [pater] provoke [parorgizo] not [me] your [humon] children [teknon] to wrath: [parorgizo] but [alla] bring [ektrepho] them [autos] up [ektrepho] in [en] the nurture [paideia] and [kai] admonition [nouthesia] of
the Lord. [kurios]KJV-Interlinear
4 And, fathers, do not provoke
your children to anger; but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of
the Lord. NASB
Fathers, is a general reference to the authority
figures of both parents, and this includes the mother in the home.
Children are to respect both parents as both
parents have authority and responsibility over the children.
However, since the father is the recognized authority
figure, then that reference is used here to indicate not the husband or dad per
se, but the position of authority, and this would naturally include the role of
the mother with regard to the children.
The rest of the verse will indicate this.
Provoke, ‘parorgizo,’ means to exasperate, to
enrage, to provoke, and is used here for the parents to not parent by means of
rage or force, and the children not to react in a similar manner. Sow rage and you harvest rage.
Nurture, ‘paideia,’ means to tutor, educate,
instruct, correct, discipline.
Admonition, ‘nouthesia,’ means call attention, bring
to their attention, warn, to sink down, to bow, to humble.
And these last two commands or instructions are the
general guideline for teaching children.
Children are taught by example. Live your life as unto the Lord and they will
follow. This means that you lead your
life based on Christian standards, which is to say that you recognize
authority, responsibility, obligation, self-discipline, honor, courtesy, good
manners, tolerance, and on and on.
Note that this has nothing to do with typical
religious rhetoric. The Christian life
is based on what you know not what you say.
And what you know comes only from your commitment to a daily study of
doctrine, including your residency in fellowship.
So, if children are brought up with care, with
discipline that is based on self-motivation and drive, and not on anger and
tyranny, then your children will most likely do well in life.
Training and the consistency in parenting are the
keys to the successful family.
Remember that the parents each still have their
mandates from God, for which they must live their lives. And this all carries over to the training and
instruction of the children.
