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Titus 1:8
8 But [alla] a lover of hospitality [philoxenos], a lover of good men [philagathos], sober [sophron], just [dikaios], holy [hosios], temperate [egkrates]; KJV-Interlinear
8 but hospitable, loving what is good, sensible, just, devout, self-controlled, NASB
In contrast to being greedy, arrogant, and prejudiced, the leader or Christian person should be polite, hospitable, and friendly.
He should be a lover of good, which means he should be one who pursues and maintains the highest standards of character, especially when dealing with people. Good does not mean rolling over when others are rude or aggressive. Good means general politeness as well as fair when dealing with others, and especially when dealing in matter of law, freedom, patriotism and so forth. Good is the product of truth, and truth possesses many standards and principles designed to strengthen and support the perpetuation of the human race.
Sober means temperate, self-control, poise. You do not fly off the handle when someone gets under your skin. You maintain the character of self control.
Just or justice refers to impartiality and fairness when dealing with matters. It refers to your ability to think with a clear head, without prejudice, without putting your own interests first or ahead of others.
Holy refers to your maintenance of a fellowship relationship with God. Holiness means set apart, sanctified, and righteous. But this righteousness is not human righteousness, but Gods righteousness. The righteousness of monitoring your own sinful or out of fellowship status and practicing confession with sufficient repetition that you are not functioning under the control of your sin nature.
Temperate means self control, self restraint. It is the strength of maturity which helps you to maintain a steady and stable personality and character under any set of circumstances.
Both the leader and the Christian are faced with many situations in life. There will always be situations, things or people who will expect you to bend the rules to help them. There will always be situations that will expect you to look the other way. There will always be situations that will make your choices for sin or bias or self, far easier than doing the right thing.
And above all, there will always be situations that will entice you to become rigid in your principles when you need to be tolerant, understanding, and flexible.
The most difficult thing in life is to know when principles need to be maintained and when they need to be loosened.
The immature believer tends to be rigid when dealing with others, and flexible when maintaining his own self rule. The mature believer learns eventually that God does all of the evaluation and disciplining, and we are only here to provide advice. We do not carry the whip.
