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James 3:3-4
3 Behold [idou], we put [ballo] bits [chalinos] in [eis] the horses [hippos]' mouths [stoma], that [pros] they [autos] may obey [peitho] us [hemin]; and [kai] we turn about [metago] their [autos] whole [holos] body [soma].
4 Behold [idou] also [kai] the ships [ploion], which though they be [on] so great [telikoutos], and [kai] are driven [elauno] of [hupo] fierce [skleros] winds [anemos], yet are they turned about [metago] with [hupo] a very small [elachistos] helm [pedalion], whithersoever [hopou] [an] the governor [euthuno] listeth [horme] [boulomai]. KJV-Interlinear
3 Now if we put the bits into the horses' mouths so that they may obey us, we direct their entire body as well. 4 Behold, the ships also, though they are so great and are driven by strong winds, are still directed by a very small rudder, wherever the inclination of the pilot desires. NASB
The tongue, the bit for a horse, and the rudder on a ship, are very small elements when compared to the larger object.
The horse can be cantankerous and unwilling to cooperate. The ship can be driven by high winds and waves. The person can be driven by their emotions.
The horse can have a mind of its own, and with its weight of perhaps a thousand pounds, is virtually unmanageable by any means other than a bit. You cannot hold it by the neck, and you certainly would not grab onto a leg. He would kick the daylights out of you.
As for the ship. Think aircraft carrier. You can't push it away from the dock with your hands. You cannot push it back from the dock if the ocean is driving it. The ship weighs into the tens of millions of tons. So, your only method of guiding it is via the rudder.
With the mere turn of a wheel, with the mere touch of the bridle, both ship and animal, in their whole body become manageable and totally under your control.
So, with the volatile nature of your attitude, you have a means of imposing self-control over yourself. Your tongue is controlled by your mind. You are the skipper of your own ship and through your own volition, you possess the means of controlling your own thoughts, and actions. Your tongue is probably the loosest of your body parts, as far as spontaneous comments or displays of your attitude.
Control it, and you are well on your way to total self-control.
But, remember self-control always begins with the power which fuels self-control, and that is Bible doctrine.